Q: I have a question about my boyfriend’s 13-year-old cat, Bart. My boyfriend can be a little paranoid and overly protective. He seems to think that he needs to make sure he never leaves his cat alone for any longer than 10 or 12 hours because it is "not nice." He believes the cat gets lonely. This causes a problem for us because we live about half an hour away from each other. It’s hard now for him to stay over, because he feels he has to rush back to be with the cat. It effects what we do, but he doesn’t realize that it’s not necessary. I’ve tried to explain it, but he thinks he is right.
The great thing about cats is that they have no concept of time. So its not like he’s staring at the clock saying, "Man, where is he?” Plus, cats sleep most of the day. I have a Rottweiler that needs more care then a cat, simply because she has to go potty outside. I can’t leave her. But a cat?
How can I explain to my boyfriend that he doesn’t need to check in on his cat the way I would my dog? How much interaction with Bart is sufficient for him not to feel like he’s being neglected? We’ve recently tried to bring Bart to my house, but he doesn’t like the carrier at all. We’ve been working with him, trying to get him more used to the carrier so we can eventually bring him over on the weekends. But I think moving him would be more stressful for him. I think he would prefer to be left at his home. How can I explain that to Bart’s dad?
A: I’m glad you brought this up. There is a common misconception that it’s OK to leave a cat alone for hours every day without a human or other animal to interact with.
Domestic cats need stimuli and interaction. It is not uncommon for cats to develop behavior challenges because they are left alone without companionship. Many of my cat-behavior cases exist because the cats have been left alone all day long without stimulation or another animal or person to interact with.
Perhaps Bart’s dad can arrange for a pet sitter come in and play with Bart during the day when he’s away. Bart’s dad should also consider hiring a pet sitter to give Bart fresh food and water and clean the litter box when he is spending the night over at your place.
You are right. Cats don’t look at clocks, nor do they wear wrist watches. They do have their own internal clocks and their own cat-concept of time, however. Cats become accustomed to activities occurring at the same time on a consistent basis. It is one of the ways they measure time. Bart knows his dad’s regular schedule. He knows when his dad normally wakes up, provides breakfast and dinner, cleans the cat box, the time his dad usually goes to bed, when they usually play, etc. Consistency is very important to a cat. Regular interaction with their human and animal companions is an important parts of cats’ worlds.
Depending on the cat and the circumstances, cats can become stressed when taken to different environments. Bringing Bart to your house for overnighters might not be the best option because of the Rottweiler and the other animals you have living with you. Also, many cats do not adjust well to new situations. Cats do best going into different places when they are acclimated to changing environments as kittens.